Josephine’s graduation photo, 1930, and later in the 1930s.

Josephine

by Susan Davis Butler, daughter

Josephine and Jerry Davis on their wedding day, Aug. 11, 1937. Elizabeth was Jo’s maid of honor and Bob Davis served as his brother’s best man.

The Davis family, 1962. Left to right: Rachel, Susan, Jerry, Jo, Sharon, Bob and in the front, Wayne.

Since I still live in mother and dad’s house, I may have more reminders of them than others, but most of my memories are from our old house where I grew up. Some of my earliest memories are of mother nursing or rocking a baby, probably Rachel or Bob, and me standing behind the chair as she read a Little Golden book or sang songs. I remember her singing the “Babes in the Woods,” “Little Gray Kitty,” “Daddy, Dear Daddy, Come Home to Us Now,” as well as hymns like “Around the Throne of God in Heaven,” “Children, Can You Tell Me Why?,” ”When Mothers of Salem,” “Jesus Calls to Little Children,” “I Think When I Read that Sweet Story of Old,” “Jesus, Tender Shepherd, Hear Me,” and, of course, little choruses like “Jesus Loves Me.” I also remember the Bible story book she and dad read to us.

After the little ones were beyond nursing or rocking to sleep, I mostly remember her working — cooking, washing, ironing, sewing, cleaning and gardening. Fresh, warm homemade bread was a special treat when we came home from school (I loved it with butter and brown sugar on it!). I remember the wash water heating in the boiler on the cookstove, and the first wringer washer we had with a wringer that had to be turned by hand. Then I watched or helped hang the clothes on the clothesline (always turning the pillowcases inside out to remove the lint from the corners), or on the wooden clothes rack upstairs (which provided some welcome humidity up there in the winter). She taught me to iron by first giving me dad’s handkerchiefs on which to practice. Before we had electricity (1948), the iron was heated on the wood stove.

When she had any spare time from indoor chores, she loved being outdoors, taking care of the chickens or working in the garden. She always said the garden was her refuge — a place to think, pray, and even cry if need be. She insisted she was sure she could live on fresh vegetables from the garden.

She would sew clothes for us as often as she could. Many of our earliest dresses were made from flour sack fabric. I remember her trying to get matching feed or flour sacks so she would have enough of the same fabric to make a dress or apron. She almost always wore an apron.

In the years when dad traveled to various assemblies to minister the Word, she almost always stayed home with us. She didn’t like the idea of dragging her children around the country and staying with strange people. Money was scarce, as I remember, and it was special when dad was able to send home a few dollars to her. I have many of the letters they wrote back and forth at that time.

When dad had his nervous breakdown in Tulsa, Oklahoma, in 1948, she left us with relatives and went down to be with him until they could come home together. Bob and I stayed with Uncle Lawrence and Aunt Fran. I remember riding the bus to school with Jan and Marilyn. Rachel stayed with Grandma most of the time, I think.

The years after 1948 were very hard for mother, as she had to struggle with getting the right mental health care for dad, the lack of finances, and dad’s ongoing depression. She spent a lot of time trying to pull dad from his depression by doing things like taking him fishing, going for picnics, and generally getting him up and about as much as she could. Working in the garden was good for him, if he would go out and do it.

She eventually had to go to work. She cleaned house for Aunt Ruth, worked at Ghostley’s Poultry Farm, the County Extension Agent, and for the Anoka-Hennepin school district. When dad was able, he worked as a salesman for The Farmer magazine.

As dad’s bipolar illness began to manifest the manic phases, life even got harder. It was hard to tell what he was going to do next, and he didn’t take well to advice most of the time. There were almost 20 years of dad’s wild swings of manic and depressive phases, partly caused by his unwillingness to stick with his medication as prescribed. It definitely took a toll on mother and all of our family.

One thing that helped mother deal with dad’s illness was her relationship with her sisters. She would take our family up to Isle frequently, and they all were very understanding of the problems she faced. Uncle Aldridge was helpful from a medical standpoint, too.

When I got married in 1964, I felt guilty for leaving mother with dad and his illness, two teenagers and an 11-year-old. I’m sure she tried to shield me from a lot that went on during the three years I was in Illinois, but I could tell it was very hard for her.

One of the things mother looked forward to during her years of work outside the home was retiring and being able to help Wayne in his greenhouse work. She was able to enjoy that for just a year or so before she developed cancer. She would be amazed to see what that operation has grown to be over the years, led by her son and daughter-in-law, her daughter and husband, and now her grandson (as well as many other family members who have worked there over the years).

I feel the stress she endured over the years contributed greatly to her developing cancer in 1978. It was a pleasure for us to move in with her and help her that year before she died. I was busy with a two-year old, an 8-year-old and trying to work part time and help her be comfortable, but I look back on it and wish I would have been more cognizant of her feelings during that time and would have taken more time to just sit and talk with her. She accepted God’s will for her and didn’t complain. I’m sure she was way more uncomfortable than she ever let on to me. Aunt Eleanor, Aunt Bessie, and others were very good to her while she was sick. Wayne and Jane and Bob and Eunice took dad into their homes and greatly sacrificed to care for him, for which I am forever grateful.

Mother was a very tough lady for as long as the Lord willed, and she worked hard to provide as “normal” a life for us as she could. The struggles we all went through helped to make us who we are today, and I truly believe the Lord “meant it all for good.” She left us the legacy of hard work and acceptance of what God has for us in our lives, and she would be happy if we would live our lives with her trust in God and His great love always in our minds and hearts.